The lesson Lydia Williams only had to learn once

Lydia Williams remembers a time, early in her career, when she let success get to her head – it’s a lesson she’ll never forget. 

Today Williams is a household name. She’s Australia’s longest-serving Matilda, having debuted in 2005, aged only 17. She would go on to play in the national squad for almost two decades. 

As a young athlete whose immense talent shone through in different youth squads, Williams was often told to be louder and more brash by coaches. 

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“Being in a really competitive environment, especially if it’s a new team or a new coach, sometimes a way you get noticed is by being out there and loud and in the face,” she tells Helen McCabe as part of FW’s Too Much podcast.

“[But] that’s never been my nature, I’ve always kind of felt that my skills and personality would always speak for themselves.

“Or, if I was going to play, it’s because they believed in me, rather than how I presented myself.” 

Williams says there were “a few times” when she was instructed to be more “arrogant and bossy”. 

“But that felt so foreign to me, and I never wanted to do that,” she recalls. 

“It felt weird, it felt awful, and kind of took away everything that I loved about playing and being in a team.”

There was one time, early in her career, when Williams let success get to her head.

“The first time I went overseas to the States, I thought I made it,” she says. 

“I was like, I’m playing in America. This is the league to be in. I’m only 20 years old … I’m playing with Megan Rapino, Cristiane, Carli Lloyd … I’m playing with all these superstars.

“And then when I came home, I had a bit of arrogance … I didn’t really want to listen, or I thought I knew better and would start questioning coaching decisions.”

“I’ve struggled throughout my life with finding an identity, whether it’s being too white, too Black, Indigenous, American.”

Williams was “taken aside and really put on the straight and narrow”.

This talking-to involved, as Williams recalls, “a lot of words that I cannot repeat and definitely would get beeped out”. 

“[I was told] the hard facts of, ‘you have not achieved anything, you haven’t won anything, you’re not even starting with the national team – you’re just in the team, and you’re playing with people who have won World Cups and gold medals at Olympics’,” she says. 

“So, yeah, that was pretty brutal, but definitely needed.”

Reflecting back now, she says the experience taught her “the difference between ego and confidence”. She only needed to learn this lesson once. 

Williams has remained humble despite her immense talent and success, and despite suggestions that she could receive more advertising dollars or sponsorship deals if she became more of a loud, brash athlete. 

“I’ve struggled throughout my life with finding an identity, whether it’s being too white, too Black, Indigenous, American, moving towns – whatever it is,” she explains. 

“And I was like, ‘why should I then add another element of being something that I’m not’?”

Williams believes staying humble has helped her process the highs and lows that come with elite-level sport. 

“[Humility] levels you out in a way,” she says. 

“You never get to that point where you’re too high and you never get to that point where you’re too low.” 

“[My advice is] don’t take humility as a weakness, find the confidence within yourself to really know and understand what you want,” she adds.

“And then go after that with direction and humility for all the success that comes with it.”