The community that gentle activism built

Welcome to our Every Woman for Each Other series in which we celebrate pairs of women who, together, are the builders, nurturers and custodians of a community.

The first duos featured in our series are the CEO and founder and Chair of Afghan Women on the Move, Maryam Zahid and Bernadette Or – and sisters Bethany ‘Beth’ and Sibylla ‘Byll’ Stephen, who lead the children’s music group, Teeny Tiny Stevies.

The former serves a community of women adjusting to a new culture in Australia – many coming from countries in conflict and holding intergenerational trauma. The latter brings together thousands of families through educational songs with all-ages appeal.

Here, both pairs speak to FW about offering their communities soft landings into deeper issues.

Maryam Zahid sat her final highschool exams in her early 20s. Growing up in war-torn Afghanistan, she’d only dreamed of studying and, after arriving in Australia as a refugee, she finally got her chance.

“I’d been deprived for 20 years of my life – and to not have anything, and [because of] the intergenerational trauma and conflict and difficulties, when you have opportunities, you want to grab everything,” Zahid shares in our Every Woman for Each Other series.

“I had to go to school pretending that I was 16, but I was 21 completing my HSC in year 11 and 12. I was [then] going to university and grabbing all the opportunities. I never said no.”

Afghan Women on the Move, the charity Zahid founded in 2020, is the result of her drive. Here she has created a safe platform for Afghan and multicultural women to gather and grow their confidence through community and life-skills programs.

“I was like, ‘she’s my Chair, because I’m the other way around. I’ve got this messy head and tidy table’ – and that’s how the connection began.”

“Getting those women back to driving and applying for jobs and finding their feet on the ground,” says Zahid. “Not to wait, the way I waited for 20 years, to find a voice and to find the confidence to do something.”

This community started as a Facebook page, where Zahid shared stories, recipes and words of encouragement to a following that rapidly soared into the thousands.

“Five years ago, I didn’t have friends. I worked nine to five and I had my kids – I didn’t have much time to go out. And there were so many other women like me that we were craving what it’s like to have a new, free life in Australia without feeling guilty,” says Zahid.

“So I thought, social media is the way to be visible and to have that connection. And as the conversation became serious, I was like, that’s a gentle [kind of] activism. Let’s register this organisation.”

Having launched and grown with the help of volunteers, Zahid recently appointed a board of directors including Bernadette Or, who was born and educated in Hong Kong before migrating to Sydney.

“I came to Australia in 1985 and I was lucky,” says Or, the new Chair of Afghan Women on the Move. “I didn’t have a horrible experience like Maryam. I found my feet quite quickly because I’ve come from a different background, but I can understand the challenges of people less fortunate and vulnerable in settling in Australia.”

“I was really impressed by how Bernadette said on her LinkedIn [profile] that she has a messy table but a tidy head,” says Zahid. “I was like, ‘she’s my Chair, because I’m the other way around. I’ve got this messy head and tidy table’ – and that’s how the connection began.”

While the new Board is, as Zahid says, tidying up the back-end, Or is relishing the connection that comes with this work. “[It’s] the human stories I like,” she says. “I get a lot more back when I connect with the community.”

Zahid and her team continue to engage with their community through social media where,  among heavier topics, she still shares cooking videos. “It’s just a much softer entry to the hearts and minds of those women,” says Zahid.

“They stop me on the main street where I live – at times I put on masks and glasses so nobody can stop me if I’m in a rush! But they definitely find you, as long as you are available.”

While shared struggles, support and hope form the basis of Zahid and Or’s community, Beth and Byll Stephen have built widespread connection and a sense of belonging through song.

Sisters Beth and Byll Stephen, who lead the children’s music group, Teeny Tiny Stevies

They were, in their original form, an indie-folk offering unearthed by Triple J – which could well be why this ARIA Award-winning sister act has achieved what a Brisbane Times reviewer described as impossible: “They have made children’s music that won’t rob adults of their will to live.”

“The Little Stevies started first and then we did a kids’ music offshoot, called the Teeny Tiny Stevies. And that’s where we’re at,” says Byll in the Every Woman for Each Other series.

Inspired by Byll’s toilet-training efforts with her then three-year-old, in 2015, she and Beth turned their talents to children’s songs. ‘On the toilet’ is the first track of their debut album, Useful Songs for Little People, which swiftly streamed into the ears and hearts of Aussie families.

Growing up, music played a leading role in the Stephen household. Byll and Beth’s parents are musicians and songwriters and would often pull in their daughters “to get that full, four-part harmony sound”. They also brought them along to gigs of local artists like Tiddas, an all-female folk trio, and sister duo Vika and Linda Bull.

“They’re going to remember the feeling of being in that moment and we were there – we made it happen!”

“They took us to see The Waifs, who are sisters,” says Byll. “Seeing sisters on stage was probably a moment for us where we were like, ‘huh, we both sing, we should try that’. These women who’ve come before us really are the other people who showed us what we could do.”

The Teeny Tiny Stevies now have four albums and three awards under their belt. They’ve written music for Sesame Studios in the US and signed a book deal with HarperCollins. But nothing is more rewarding than connecting with their community – both on and off-stage.

“When people come up to us – whether it’s after a show or they write to us – and they share vulnerable stories where our songs have helped them or their family. They’re the moments you go, ‘Oh, wow. It’s really worthwhile what we’re doing’,” says Beth.

“I love standing there watching the connection between parents and their kids happen in front of me,” says Byll. “It’s so cool because you just know, watching it, this is a core memory… They’re going to remember the feeling of being in that moment and we were there – we made it happen!”

As the duo share, their creative career has come with challenges. “There’s just a lot of setbacks if you’re starting something from scratch,” says Beth. “And it can be embarrassing.”

“Being a performer is embarrassing,” agrees Byll. “It doesn’t matter what you’re doing, you’ll be humiliated daily.”

Indignity can also be a rite of passage for those of us making our very own mini-community – our family – in all its toilet-training-filled glory. But Byll, Beth and their fans have found a way to overcome almost any awkwardness.

“Both [in our] live shows and online content, whether that be social media content or the videos that we make, there is always an element – and quite a large element – of humour and comedy,” says Beth. “People love to laugh, you know?”